Wednesday, June 20, 2012

When I Was a Kid

When I was a kid, I used to lie on the grass next to my dog and listen to my neighbor mow his lawn or my other neighbors laugh as they ran through the sprinklers.

Now that I am an adult, I lie in my bed at night and listen to police sirens, horns honking, and neighbors screaming from their apartment windows, saying stuff like, "Turn that crap down or I will GET you!" (Sometimes I'm the one screaming that.)

When I was a kid, I was afraid to look under my bed at night, because I thought that I would get pulled into the monsters' world.

Now that I'm an adult, I'm not afraid of monsters under my bed because I know that they're not real. What I am afraid of now are monsters in human form, all of whom are very real: the guys who try to grope me on the street and the ones who yell obscenities at me from their cars, the mobs of thieves who gang up on people and beat them up before stealing everything they have, and the drivers who care more about updating their Twitter feed than watching the road.

When I was a kid, I used to be so excited on Christmas Eve that I couldn't sleep, because I kept trying to listen for the sound of reindeer on the roof.

Now that I'm an adult, I'm excited for Christmas to be over, because then I don't have to watch people arm-wrestle each other for scented candles.

When I was a teenager, one reason I studied hard in school was because I didn't want to still be working minimum wage jobs after I graduated from college.

When I was in my twenties, I graduated from college with honors but continued working minimum-wage jobs where I got bossed around by twenty-two-year-old supervisors on power trips and customers who apparently believed that treating salespeople like dirt will get them into heaven.

When I was a teenager, I dreamed about Prince Charming riding in on a white horse and rescuing me.

Now that I'm in my thirties, I know that Prince Charming doesn't exist, but his wicked stepbrothers, aka Prince Rude, Prince Insincere, Prince Drinks-a-Lot, and Prince Inappropriate-Touching, are everywhere. I know because I dated them.

When I was in my twenties, I wanted to be the kind of teacher who inspired her students to read and write for fun and not just for school.

Now that I'm in my thirties, I want to be the teacher who makes her students pay more attention to her than to their cell phones during class.

When I was younger, I read books because they allowed me to escape into a different world, and they introduced me to characters who understood how I felt, because they felt the same way.

Now that I'm older, I still read books for the same reasons.


I guess some things never change.


What about you? What kinds of things did you do/think when you were younger, and how did those things change when you got older?

22 comments:

  1. When I was a kid, I never thought about the future. Now, I try to return to that mindset. When I was a teenager, I dreamed of short-lived romances and living in France. Now, I live in the Middle East and dream of long-term love. When I was in college, I dreamed of editing and living in books. Now, I dream of living with people.

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    1. Hi mmarinaa,
      I used to dream of living in France too, because it was so different from where I grew up. I would still like to live there someday; I read in one of Natalie Goldberg's books that Paris in particular is a good place for writers.
      You've definitely come a long way by moving to the Middle East. You should write a book about it.

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  2. When I was a kid, I couldn't wait to grow up. I resented it when adults told me to slow down, there's no rush, I'll be big someday. Now I tell my children the same thing. As an adult (finally!) I have a different perspective on time, and how quickly it goes and how quickly life can change.

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    1. Hi Emily,
      I looked forward to growing up too, mainly because I wanted to be independent. But now that I finally am grown up (mostly), I find myself missing certain parts of my childhood. So I know what you mean about how adulthood can give you a different perspective.

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  3. You know, I was going through a box of old stuff as I was packing and moving, and I found this card that a friend of mine sent me in college, freshman year, over Christmas break. Basically it said "We will miss all the silly things you say over the holiday"

    Which made me laugh, and think, well maybe I really haven't changed all that much.

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    1. Hi Sara,
      It's good to keep old cards and other mementos like that, because they remind us what life was like back then and who we were. That's why I still keep old pictures and journals.

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  4. Ah nostalgia! This doesn't answer your question but i had to comment on it:

    Although i've never had the pleasure of witnessing it, i do believe i would rather enjoy watching people arm wrestle each other for scented candles!

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    1. Hi Alice X,
      I've never arm-wrestled anyone for a scented candle, but then again I've always been paranoid about using candles. And they always just end up smelling like wax anyway after the scent wears off.

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  5. Whenever I was a kid, I remember getting lost in the moment of fun, but now that I'm older (in my thirties), I don't get many of those moments anymore. It is a shame. Now, I just think it is not so much being 'lost' but 'found', for it seems that during those 'lost' moments life gets savored the most and is the most real.

    Also, I remember it seemed like time was blisffuly slow and everything was exciting and free, especially in the summer. Now, it seems the day is gone before I know it and, while I've done a lot during the day, I wonder what I really did do.

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    1. Hi Charles,
      I think that one reason time goes by more quickly now is that adults have more responsibilities and more work than kids do. I think that all those responsibilities are why I often feel guilty when I take time off just to do what I want to do.

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  6. When I was a kid, I thought that my responsibility was to make everyone else happy. That's what I was taught. When I grew up, I realized that although that's a nice thing to do, the most important thing is to make sure that I am happy first and foremost. That's how I turned back to writing.

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    1. Hi Julie,
      That's good that you're focusing on what makes you happy. Writing makes me happy too, because it's something that I can do that's just for me.

      Delete
  7. I'm something of a closet workaholic (shh - don't tell). Thanks for your recent comment. Lead me to your blog, which is awesome. As a kid, I thought for certain I'd be hunting ghosts with a proton thrower. Now I just write about ghosts. :)

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    1. Hi David,
      Welcome to my blog! I've heard about other people who really do look for/hunt ghosts. It makes me wonder what they'll do if they actually "caught" one of them; I think that would be an interesting conversation.

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  8. When I was a kid, I mostly recall thinking that time went very slow; it seemed like days were much longer, birthdays happened far less often, and it always "took forever" for it to be summer vacation or Christmastime. Now, I feel like time is something I am constantly chasing. I hear it only gets worse, which I must admit almost scares me. A year ago now seems like a day. Why is that?

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    1. Hi Teddi,
      I think it's partly because holidays like Christmas and summer vacation are different once we get older. Summer vacation, for example, is a lot shorter for most adults. And Christmas is more stressful because of all the shopping. Kids don't really have to worry about that, so they can just focus on the good aspects.

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  9. I liked the last part of your post. It seems that escaping into a book is one of the few things that's pretty constant for a lot of us. Still, I never feel as completely immersed as I did when I was a kid. I think it's hard for adults to completely focus on one thing.

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    1. Hi Nick,
      I think that one reason it's hard to focus is because adults do a lot of multi-tasking. That is, we can check e-mail, make phone calls, listen to music, and watch TV, all at the same time. But the good thing about books is that it allows people to escape anywhere they want to go.

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  10. Oh, you're so cynical. Made me laugh. I just left the people shouting in the streets this month, which is a nice change. Actually, that was on of the things that hadn't changed for me in the last decade. I grew up in New York City and then lived in an area in Cambridge, which seemed just as "spirited".

    Don't lose the feeling of being able to change the world. It can still happen.

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    1. Hi Theresa,
      I guess it's hard not to be cynical, because a lot of the things that I thought would happen when I was younger never actually did happen. Or they didn't happen in the way that I thought they would.

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  11. That's what books are for :-) I don't know what I'd do without fiction!

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    1. Hi Deniz,
      I like creative nonfiction too, especially funny memoirs. But fiction is wonderful because it lets us see that there is more than one way of understanding the world.

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